Its Moooo

Martin: Do you keep your patients waiting like this?
Frasier: Oh, just the compulsives.

Frasier: It's supposed to say, "Congratulations, Dad."
Deliveryman: There wasn't room.
Frasier: People have written the Declaration of Independence on a grain of rice!
Deliveryman: Not with frosting.

Kenny: There she is. Now, I gotta warn you, Doc, she's uh, in a eelchair-way.
Frasier: Does her handicap preclude her from understanding Pig Latin?

Daphne: I suppose I like my gents more on the manly side. [Looking at the napkin Niles is holding]
Daphne: Is that a little swan you just made?
Niles: No, it was a B-52.

Frasier: Have you any idea of appropriate baseball-watching attire?
Niles: Obviously, you failed to detect the subtle diamond pattern in my tie

Joey - You're smoking again?
Chandler - Well, actually, yesterday i was smoking again, today i'm...i'm smoking still.

"Cheese. It's milk that you chew."
"Crackers. Because your cheese nedds a buddy."
"A grape. Because who can get a water melon in your mouth."
"The phone. Bringing you closer to people who have phones."
"Bagels and doughnuts. Round food, for every mood."
"Pants. Like shorts, but longer."

Phoebe: What am I sitting on?
Chandler: Top of the world? dock of the bay?

Ross: I just got back from the vet.
Chandler: She's not going to make you wear one of those big plastic cones, is she?

Chandler: I got her machine.
Joey: Her answering machine?
Chandler: No, interestingly enough her leaf-blower picked up.

Joey:... it's a moo point
Rachel:... you mean a moot point
Joey:... no no, a moo point ... like a cow's opinion, doesn't matter ... it's moo ...